My ex surprised me by sending me a series of friendly texts yesterday. They were the no-big-deal type of texts, but it was nice to be able to briefly shoot the breeze. It all started with his complimenting my family’s lessons in dongs.

So, since he was catching up with my blog, I thought I would take a glance at his. I saw one post that said something like, “I don’t have all my shit together, but she makes me happy and not stressed.”

He brings up a great point. You should not be with someone who makes you stressed. I expected too much out of him, and he expected much less (e.g., affection, control) out of me. This, in turn, left us both miserable.

The ex and I are now seeing new people, and they are so much better suited for us. Granted we’re still in the beginning stages (though we have been frenemies practically our whole lives), being with Rob is so easy. It’s fun, exciting, and relaxing because we hold the same values. We also believe in taking care of ourselves and each other. It’s much easier not to get stressed when it’s apparent that your goals are aligned.

Being with someone who isn’t right for you will give you insecurities, anxiety, and frustrations galore. So why do it? If you are in a relationship that is nothing but hard work, don’t force it. There’s someone that can coexist with you peacefully. You deserve to make your only life a happy one.